The DJ has to play for more than one person...so what you may hate may be another's favourite song, and EVERYTHING played here can be danced to in one way or another.

BE SERIOUS! We play no songs in this club that don't have a beat of some sort!

PLEASE don't sing for the DJ. Their ears are one of their most important assets and they need to be looked after very carefully. They already have to put up with the smoke fluid and music at high decibel levels, so do him a favour and DON'T try singing!

Oh sure!...so you've questioned everyone in the club and, as their spokesperson, you're requesting the song!

The DJ won't dance so I guess that blows a hole in that theory!

Why settle for one night? Buy the CD and get laid for a whole month.

It's a lot easier for you to go and have another beer and figure out what you want to hear than it is for the DJ to recite the name of every song he has with him.

It is NOT advisable to say this when the dance floor is packed (but some people do anyways), HOWEVER, even if there is one person on the dance floor, it STILL contradicts the statement, and they probably asked for the track they are dancing to, so if you are going to request a song I shall request written proof people will dance to it.

The ONLY person who can get away with that statement pays the DJ's wages. Since a lot of people do request records, why should your request come above anyone else's?....it does however speed up the process if you tip the DJ generously!

So, you were the person who was kind enough to pay for EVERYONE IN THE CLUB to get in, and then bought them ALL their drinks...well you forgot to ask the DJ what he wanted.

Don't be rude to the waitor; he'll spit in your food / Don't be rude to the DJ; he won't play your song, humiliate you over the mic. and spit in your drink!